The Coat That Was Never Returned

When I was 24, I lent my best wool coat to a team member before his pitch. He forgot it on a train.

He apologized, and I told him, “It’s not the coat. It’s what it meant to you.”

He looked at me, confused.

What he didn’t realise was that I wasn’t upset about the loss of fabric.

I was mourning a missed moment of dignity, for him, not me.

That was the day I understood the true meaning of delegation.

Not handing something over. But handing something up.

THE WHY, Delegation Isn’t Optional. It’s Ethical.

If you're running a micro or small business in the Netherlands with a team of 3 to 20 people, here's what you already know:

You are the bottleneck.

You delegate tasks.

But not power.

You assign responsibility.

But retain control.

And what’s worse: the people you could trust either burn out, walk out, or check out.

Delegation done poorly is not just inefficient. It’s unethical.

Why? Because it creates dependency, confusion, and fear.

And in a country like the Netherlands, where employee rights, trust, and process matter, a toxic delegation culture will not just hurt your business.

It will expose you to financial penalties, reputational risk, and talent attrition.

THE NUMBERS, The Cost of “Doing It Myself”

Let’s be honest about what “just doing it myself” really costs:

• €3,500/month: average productivity loss when a founder micromanages instead of empowering a team leader.
• 1 in 3: Dutch employees under 35 leave a role within 12 months due to lack of growth and unclear ownership.
• €6,000+: cost to replace one mid-level team member (recruitment + training + downtime).
• 24 hours/month: time wasted by small business owners rechecking work they could have structured better from the start.

Delegation is not a cost-saving tactic. It is a trust-saving mechanism.

WHAT NO ONE TELLS YOU, You Are Delegating Already. Just Badly.

Here’s the ugly truth:

Even if you think you're not delegating, you are.

Confused team roles? That’s passive delegation.

Answering every minor question? That’s emotional outsourcing.

Expecting initiative but punishing errors? That’s delegation by sabotage.

You’re always delegating, either by design or by default.

What’s missing is dignity. Dignity for you and for them.

Delegating with dignity means:

• Setting clear expectations without surveillance.
• Giving access to decision-making, not just tasks.
• Valuing mistakes as data, not betrayal.
• Creating feedback loops that teach, not trap.

In Dutch culture, where structure, equality, and clarity are core values, this is not just nice. It’s necessary.

DECISION COMPASS, Ask Yourself Today:

1. What don’t I delegate and why? Fear? Ego? Shame?
2. Have I named the roles and boundaries of my team, or do we all swim in ambiguity?
3. When something goes wrong, do I investigate structure, or blame the person?
4. Would my team say they feel trusted, or just managed?
5. What recurring task is draining me that someone else could grow into, if I gave them a real seat at the table?

FINAL REFLECTION, Delegation Is a Spiritual Act

To delegate with dignity is to say:

“I trust you enough to fail. And I will not define you by your worst moment.”

It’s one of the most radical gestures a founder can make.

Not because it’s soft, but because it’s sovereign.

You are not in business to prove you can carry it all.

You are in business to build something worth carrying, together.

Let go. Not out of exhaustion. But out of clarity.

That’s not weakness.

That’s leadership.